You're at a bar, but forgot your ID. How do you prove you were born in 1997 or earlier?

1. Bartender: Have your ID? Me: No, I forgot it. How can I prove that I'm over 21? Bartender: Go get your fucking ID.
   — Hudsons_Heroes


2. In all seriousness, you can't. When I'm buying beer at the grocery store I get carded even though my beard is half gray and I have my two teenage kids with me.
   — LonesomeHebrew


3. Cut part of your arm off and let the bouncer count the rings.
   — muggledave






4. Went to a bar and few years back and a chick got in with her highschool yearbook.
   — stumpdawg


5. Sing them the song of my people The AOL internet connection song.
   — BreachyJoe


6. One look at my 61 year old face ought to do it.
   — clit-eastwould






7. Flash the bouncer. Either they will love my tits and let me in, or they will go "yep, you're old." And let me in. Win-win.
   — RedditIsATimeSucker


8. I have a picture of my drivers license in my google drive. It worked for me 3/3 times
   — Lurpyftw


9. "ID, please." "... Damn, I must have forgotten it at home." "No ID, no entry." "Aw, come on! I'm old enough! Honestly, I can prove it!" "Oh, yeah? How?" "I, uh... I used to de-spaghettify my cassette tapes with a pencil." "That's not really proof, is it? You could have read about people doing that." "Fair point. Okay, how about this: I remember drinking Ecto Cooler!" "No dice. They brought it back in 2016." "Really?" "Yeah. It wasn't as good." "It was never good. It was just green." "Heh, yeah. Okay, I guess you really drank it." "That's proof, right?" "I don't know..." "Alright, here's undeniable proof: *Deee-dee-deee deeKRSSSHHT! Dee-KRRSSHHHHT!*" "What are you..." "Nrr-*KSSHT*, nrr-*KSSHT*, *KSHHHHHHT!*" "Are you having a stroke?" "No, I'm imitating a modem." "Huh. Mine always went *Tshhhting-tshhting*-KRAKRAKA-*chchchchch*-dingDING." "Oh, you had America Online, didn't you?" "It's kind of pathetic that you can tell that based on the dialup noise." "I guess... but it's proof, right? Can I come in now?" "Sure. Just show me your ID." ------ **TL;DR: I'd reminisce about the nineties, then make obnoxious noises.**
   — RamsesThePigeon