How do you know you're in a healthy relationship?

When you aren't walking on eggshells around the other person. You aren't worried about their reaction, because their reaction to situations is rational.
— jillygetyourgum

Shes watching tv downstairs and im in bed upstairs on Reddit... and that's ok. Its Saturday night 10pm
— throw_whales_away

When you both acknowledge your own failings and are willing to work on them. When you put the other person before yourself, communication is open and trust is prominent.
— iamMarkPrice

There aren't intense high and lows. In my current relationship, there's a steady contentedness. We're not constantly on the verge of not working out. If there is a problem, both of us are invested enough and care for each other enough to want to work through it.
— liona678

When you are comfortable just lying around together doing nothing
— Barack-YoMama

Not sure if this counts as healthy or not. A few weeks ago my wife casually asked me what yesterday's date was. "Umm, the 11th July", I said. "And what day is that"? "Oh shit! Our wedding anniversary". She laughed, I laughed. We've been married for 15 years and have completely forgotten our anniversary about 6 or 7 times now. It's like a running joke. Having said that, God help me if I ever forgot her birthday.
— DrLovingstone

Conflict is normal. Hostility is not. When you can comfortably disagree on things, it's likely you're in a healthy relationship. ETA: another general rule for a good relationship is having good experiences with your partner five times as often as bad experiences.
— elenabuena13

My brother and sister-in-law told me this story once. I like it because there's nothing else special except this one little note - It was a weekday. They each work at demanding jobs so they both come home pretty tired. My brother got home first and started doing things around the apartment that needed to be done. My sister-in-law comes home and brings him a chipwich icecream for no special reason. That's how my brother knew she loved him. That's just been a relationship goal for me to experience ever since. FUCK YOU MY EX'S
— mc2157

You argue, but it's productive and doesn't escalate into a full-on fight. Some strong language, but no put-downs, and you're always able to fall asleep next to each other.
— theoptionexplicit

(Just celebrated 4 year anniversary last month) Couple points. 1) You don't 'fight', you 'discuss'. Sure, voices may get raised sometimes, but if both of you realize that it is both of you against a problem, instead of both of you against each other, you are in a good place. (Ex. Money is tight. Instead of fighting over who spends how much on what, you sit down and budget) 2) Lack of undeserved jealousy. Sure, it's okay to be annoyed if that sleazy coworker of hers keeps hitting on her, but as long as she keeps rebuffing him, so what? Oh, he has female friends? Let him have them! 3) Nothing feels 'forced'. You WANT to spend time together. You miss them when they are not around. I am talking long after the initial passionate phase has passed. 4) You don't define each other. You are still you, with your own hobbies and goals, as are they. 5) It doesn't feel like 'work'. If I have to 'work' at a friendship, it might be toxic. Same here. Not saying relationships don't struggle, but see point number 1.
— KMApok

To me, a hallmark sign of being in a healthy relationship is when I'm not looking for a way out. I feel content when I know we're both planning for the future: a future together. If I can't imagine myself with him 6 months down the line for whatever reason, there is an issue that needs to be sorted out.
— fusfeimyol

Top 10 Answers