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What was the worst case of parents pushing their dreams onto their children you have seen?
- I live in Texas and I can't tell you how many of my neighbors are pushing football on their kids. One neighbor in particular has been putting his son through practices in his backyard for as long as I can remember. He has all the equipment you would see on a high school football practice field and all afternoon you hear a whistle chirping. The dad blew out his knee his junior season of high school and never got over it.
The kids is 10 now and I have no doubt he could kick my ass.
— MarriedIntoTrashyFam
- When I was a kid at the chessclub there was another kid there. He started school at 8 am. Then he sang in a choir. After that it was football. Then chess. After that home to do homework. We usually finished around 9 pm. Having 1½-2 hours worth of homework wasn't unusual. All his days were something like that.
He didn't even get to play himself. His grandma (who only knew how the pieces moved and nothing about strategy) sat there telling him what to do. She didn't even attempt to explain why she thought it was a good move, just "do it". I started getting more and more annoyed at her. I wanted to play with her grandson, not Mrs. "Do everything I say without question or explanation". He played a lot better when grandma wasn't there. She acted really offended when I told her to let him play, shut up for a few moves and then she was at it again.
Eventually he quit everything except school. I kept hoping that he'd show up at the chessclub without grandma, but I understand why he didn't.
— MeppeKR
- As a coach for little league softball (my team was 10U at the time) we had this one dad who just insisted that his daughter be a pitcher. She was honestly one of our best infielders so we played her at second base and she liked that position. She was a decent pitcher but much preferred being at second base and we had 2 other girls that were better pitchers.
Dad wasn't happy about that and I didn't see her next season. I hope he got over it. She liked softball and had a knack for it but Dad was about to ruin it for her by forcing her to pitch.
— schneiten
- I work in a law office. Had a client who forced his daughter to talk with my boss so that my boss could try and convince her to take law school. The enrolment was in one week and she refused to go because she was uninterested in being a lawyer and was content in the college degree that she already has.
— PatchouliTea
- My cousins were forced to become doctors. They hate it to hell and back, and it's just sad to see them not being able to live their dreams.
— Fifteenandcounting
- This guy I went to middle / high school with had a father who wanted his son to be the "Rights answer to JFK", sort of a Rush Limbaugh type who could win political offices.
He spent all of his free time going to NRA shooting competitions, and every activity he had to be the captain or he would quit. Also, on everything political he would have a really "witty" response, you know like "Yea well my gun has killed less people that Ted Kennedy" or "I lasted longer than the French". His dad also held him a year back so he would be bigger and stronger than everyone else in the class - which just made him a douche. He was supposed to go to college and be both the student body president, and captain of the shooting team. - Instead he promptly changed to a different college and quit shooting. Interesting fellow really.
— ooo-ooo-oooyea
- I worked as a technician at a major teen girls pageant one time and it's really depressing. Some of the girls you could tell were into it offstage, but so many of them looked miserable, and some even looked frightened of their parents.
— andlaughlast
- A friend of mine works in Broadway productions and has seen some monstrous stage moms. When he was working on Mary Poppins, one stage mom would buy a seat and sit there taking notes on her kid's performance to grill him on later. She also dragged the kid to all sorts of acting classes, dance classes, etc. The kid had no social skills and no friends.
My friend now works on a show with no kids in the cast.
— transemacabre
- This doesn't exactly answer the question but it's close enough and I really want to tell this story.
I dated a guy in college who told me that, if we got married, we'd have to use an egg donor to have kids because I'm short. You see, if his kids ended up being shorter than 6'3, it would be harder for them to become professional athletes. Being professional athletes was the only acceptable career choice for his future sons (of course he wouldn't have any daughters, how absurd). That relationship didn't last.
I feel bad for his future kids.
— CherryCuntsicle
- Parents of a 12-year-old boy envisioned him becoming a "concert pianist" and brought him to me for lessons. (He had been taking lessons previously with a different teacher, but it wasn't going anywhere.)
I asked him what *his* dreams were - what was of interest to him. It was clear that he liked the piano a lot, but becoming a professional pianist was his *parents'* vision for his future, not his.
His folks kept "pushing, pushing, pushing," forcing him to practice more hours and to stay focused almost entirely on learning new pieces - to the point where at one lesson he broke into tears and said he liked learning music, but couldn't stand the pressure from his parents any more.
At that point I interceded on his behalf and explained that they were driving him *away from* music rather than drawing him to it.
Thankfully, they heeded my advice and stopped lessons until such time as he might decide for himself to resume - which, I'm happy to report, he did! Now, he plays beautifully and very relaxed.
— Back2Bach
- Dad is forcing us to continue his business even though none of my siblings or I want to. I'm not a natural business person like he is and I don't want to stay in my hometown any longer than what I have to.
— mommasspaghetti
- I work at a private preschool teaching 2-3 year olds. Out of a 24 kid class, three of the kids' parents have already chosen what college they want to send their kid to.
Edit for wording
— kurikaesarete
- I used to play on a lot of soccer teams when I was a kid(maybe from 6 years old to about 14 or so) and this kid's dad used to always show up to his games and yell at the ref about calls being made about his kid and shit like that. He yells at his son to run faster and work harder but when his son fucks up somewhere it's either his son is a failure or the ref is picking on his son.
You know the type. Anyways one day when I was about 13 or 14 this kid showed up with his dad and started stretching with the rest of us but he looked tired as hell. We asked him what was up but barely got an audible grunt before his dad ran toward him and asked him if he wanted his drink. About 20 mins after drinking this drink the kid was bouncing all over the place and looked like he was ready to play 20 games.
About half way through the game the kid's dad was yelling and screaming as usual and the kid goes to kick the ball then ends up on the ground. We were all wondering what the hell happened. His dad ran up and started yelling as usual and getting bad blaming the other kid on the other team for going after the ball at the same time(I mean the whole point of playing a game is to win right?). He ended up being carried away on a cart from an ambulance and we didn't hear from him for a while.
About 3 games later and we see him on the sidelines with a cast on his leg and his dad looking pissed with his mom next to his dad and giving him stern looks. Turns out his dad had been giving his kid caffeine pills to boost his energy and making him practice hardcore at home and in doing this he strained his leg too much to the point of him tearing his ACL due to the increased stress combined with his recklessness of the caffeine.
We all felt hella bad for him but his mom was fucking *PISSED* at the dad. Reamed him out hardcore any time he was about to speak up to the ref and tell him how to do his job. She apparently had no idea what her son was going through and the dad used to be some huge soccer star and was about to go pro or something.
Never saw him much after that, the mom ended up going to the games with him after his leg healed up but he could never play professionally anymore due to that injury.
Last I heard from that kid is he grew up and is going to school for pharmacology or something, so good for him.
— MilitaryFish