What’s a short, clean joke that gets a laugh every time?

1. A duck was standing next to a busy road, cars were zooming past while he waited for a break in traffic. A chicken walked up to it and says "Don't do it, man. You'll never hear the end of it"
   — weliveintheshade


2. If you have the opportunity, "This is my step ladder. I never knew my real ladder."
   — johnbugara


3. What's the difference between in-laws and outlaws? Outlaws are wanted
   — Professor_pranks






4. My grandmothers last words before she kicked the bucket were "Hey how far do you think I can kick this bucket?" Edit: To everyone that sent me hate mail can you relax, the bucket is fine
   — 93jay


5. A man is washing his car with his son when the boy goes 'Dad, can't we use a sponge?'
   — slashchunks


6. What's the difference between a good joke and a bad joke timing
   — yyzlhrteach






7. Knock knock Who's there? Owls Owls who? Yes they do!
   — nissansilviafan


8. Why can't dinosaurs clap? Because they're dead
   — PM_ME_GHOST_FEET


9. (When driving past a cemetery) "Did you know that the people living in this town aren't allowed to be buried here?" "Why?" "Because they're still alive."
   — symbiosa






10. An Englishman, a Frenchman, a Spaniard and a German are all watching a dolphin do some excellent tricks. The dolphin notices that the four gentlemen have a very poor view, so he jumps higher out of the water and calls out, “Can you all see me now?” “Yes.” “Oui.” “Sí.” “Ja.”
    — Artemis420


11. What's ET short for? Because he's got little legs
    — goodmicroscope


12. Dads are like boomerangs. I hope
    — 5meterhammer






13. Two satellites decide to get married. It wasn't much of a wedding, but boy was that reception amazing!
    — idontknow1138


14. Why does Norway put bar codes on all it's ships? So they can Scandinavian.
    — paaccc