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What is the dumbest thing you did to impress a crush?


  1. Dressed up as Santa and asked her to the Christmas Dance in front of entire school. Been dating for awhile. She dumped me shortly after to go out with some college guy she later married. I hate Christmas.
    — AmorphicMike

  2. Swam across a river filled with crocodiles. When we were together she admitted that this was the one thing that made her have second thoughts about going out with me. Don't try impress crushes, just talk to them, even if swimming across a crocodile filled river seems easier.
    — TotallyADalek

  3. When I was 12, I started biting my fingernails because I thought that would bring me closer to my crush who also bit his nails. Obviously that didn't work out and here I am at 21 and still biting my nails.
    — emotionsfurb



  4. Intentionally fell off the slide in like grade 4 My right shoulder always hurts 12 years later
    — BlancheKun

  5. I got this! When I was like ten or twelve, I hid behind a building and punched myself in the face so that this girl I liked would see that I can bleed without crying. Haha
    — lapandemonium

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    — [deleted]



  7. She worked at a burger place. I was absolutely infatuated with her, would have done anything to see her, let alone impress her. The place she worked had a challenge to eat like 4-6oz patties on a burger in a time-trial-esque manner. Top time went to the next stage, winner won a lot of money or something. I went there to impress her and ordered it, she sat with me to record my time. Mind you, I was pretty large at the time, around 60lbs overweight. They brought the burger out and I didn't even give it time to cool. My fat ass sat alone in front of the girl of my dreams at her place of employment and *wolfed* down a burger way too big for any normal person all the while slightly whimpering as it burned the roof of my mouth. Can you say *alpha*? I couldn't because I burned my mouth. Shit hurt for like 3 days too and I was out like $15. If you're reading this you know who you are. Sorry I was a weirdo. I mean I still kinda am but at least I'm aware now.
    — NewbSaysRawr

  8. Can't take credit for this but it happened to my little brother. My younger brother has high functioning autism and it results in him not being able to understand people's intentions. When he was about 9 years old he had a "girlfriend" that lived in our development. Our development was right next to a farm and there were sheep. One day his girlfriend said she wanted a sheep, so he climbed the fence, made a leash out of rope and attempted to take the sheep out of the fencing. There was a ram in the area and it started to chase him away. He managed to get away unscratched but twisted his ankle and got yelled at by the owners. I had to take him to the owners to apologize and they said they were just worried he would get hurt and offered to take him into their farm to see all the animals.
    — Freudsloveofcigars

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  11. Grade 2. Stole one girls sweater to impress other girl. Hid it in the boys bathroom. Did not get girl. Got detention.
    — pisspantsing

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    — [deleted]



  13. I was staying at a friends house in the country with another friend and we were 16. A couple girls come over from a town over so we decided to have a fire outside since it’s still fall weather. I proceed to smoke a pack of cigarettes. I had just recently started smoking so my body just shuts down from all the nicotine. I suffer from my choice because I’m passing out in front of the fire where I get extremely hot, only to move back and become cold then. Perpetually stuck in a temperature limbo. One of my friends decides to jump a row of chairs he set up. Ends up eating shit from the second to last chair. Pride was thin and our skill sets were re-examined the following day.
    — Suhhh_dude

  14. Signed up for a half marathon training group so I could spend more time around him. Oh and his girlfriend is also in the running group. At least I'm getting in good shape.
    — nojoydivision

  15. Back in High School AOL Instant Messenger was a thing. Every morning before school I would try to post in my 'auto message' some profound statement about love or relationships often using song lyrics. I did this specifically in the hopes that my crush (who was one of my friends on IM) would see it and have some revelation about how awesome I was. Looking back that was a lot of energy spent for something I could've done by just being myself around her.
    — mikeytherock



  16. I went on a date with a girl in high school, we had a few classes together and I liked her quite a bit. The date actually went really well, so I drove her home and walked her to the door, got a hug, and went back to my car. Well, she gives me the cute little behind the shoulder blown-kiss. So, my dumbass decides to impress her by backing out of her driveway as fast as I could. At this time I was driving a 1993 S10 Blazer with a rather egregious trailer hitch. I rammed her neighbor’s brand new Honda, hitch first. My hitch hit right between the rear quarter panel and door, destroying both. This car was literally on two wheels, impaled by my PoS SUV. I haven’t talked to her since, but her neighbor is a cool guy and we actually talk frequently.
    — DummGhahrr

  17. Pretended i knew how to read arabic Edit: for those asking, it was just plain cringe. Im not arabic, she wasnt arabic. Stupid teenage years
    — Spade7891



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